What a dull story
by Hapi Djus
Summary: Harry wakes up and has absolutely no interest in looking out the window. All the day he is of course still oblivious to the fact that the sun is behind a cloud... New plot in every chapter!R
1. Chapter 1

(a/n: this story is supposed to be a VERY short so don't expect anything big to happen... I sound like my english teacher...By the way.. please review! )

Disclaimer: I do not own harry potter, all this stuff belongs to J. K. Rowling. Except from the plot... That, is inspired by my bigsis' story she told the other night.

**Chapter 1: Harry waking up**

Harrys eyes opened slowly, with the feeling that a little ray of sun hit his face. Though he wasn't sure, he chose the fact not to look out the window.

Alredy now he was oblivious to the fact that the sun was behind a cloud.

He got dressed, went into the bathroom, brushed his teeth, among doing other things that i don't have time to discuss now.

Harry was of course still oblivious to the fact that the sun was behind a cloud.

At the same time, Hagrid was wondering why, the sun was behind a cloud. Never mind... Back to the story

Harry went down the stairs, Wondering what was for breakfast. Maybe scrambled eggs and bacon...?

This was his first their at hogwarts, and he had a hard time in remembering where the Great Hall was. At last he found Ron and Hermione( who had started to be their friend.. After all they saved her from the troll...), who didn't exactly recall where the Great hall was, but at last, they found it.

Harry was of course still oblivious to the fact that the sun was behind a cloud.

They entered the Great Hall, Began to eat, when Ron asked Hermione: " What is 25 times 25?". Both Harry and Hermione looked at Ron.

"What is THAT suppoesed to mean! Don't you learn anything? You better just find out yourself 'cause i ain't gonna help you!". Hermione said furiously.

She had such a bad temper, when it comes to people who are daydreaming away all the classes..

"Who said i wanted your help? HM?" Ron answered, just as furiously.

Harry was of course still oblivious to the fact that the sun was behind a cloud.

He then noticed Hermione. She picked up an egg, and... dum dum dum duuuuum... she THREW it at Ron.

(sorry for the short chapter, but i don't think i could make it, like, 4 pages or stuff like that)


	2. In A Dark, Dark Cave?

_Disclaimer: I own what you don't recognize. Everything else belongs to the wonderful Jo Rowling_

**Chapter 2: InA Dark, Dark Cave...**

It was now their 7th year at Hogwarts. Ron was still mad at Hermione because of the 'Egg Incident', and she would occasionally break down in the middle of a corridor because the memory was just _so funny! _Of course Harry was still oblivious to the fact that the sun was behind a cloud that particular day in 1st year…

'So, thirteen was seen as an unlucky number because…?' Ron asked no one in particular, desperately trying to finish his Aritmacy essay on time.

'It's seen as unlucky because, at the time the months were made, they used the moon's four phases to make a calendar. At first they split the year in 13 months, but that turned out to be too complicated. That's why 13 became a difficult number, and therefore an unlucky number with many. At last it was decided to have just 12 months with an extra day every fourth year. 13 is also a very strong number because of '7-9-13'.', Hermione replied to no one in particular. Then she broke down in laughter, because that memory from first year was just _so funny!_

Harry was of course still oblivious to the fact that the sun was behind a cloud that particular day in first year. Little did he know of the fact that the fact that the sun was behind a cloud that particular day in first year was crucial in the search of the Horcruxes.

The war was hopefully soon over; Voldemort was still alive and well (maybe not well, but he was alive!), and nobody was happy.

But let's be honest. How many can hold away a depression when there's a war going on. Somewhere sadder than others and this is where Draco Malfoy is a perfect example.

Draco made the depressive maniacs in St. Mungo's look stable and optimistic when compared to him.

Of course Ickle Drakie wasn't in school. He sat in a dark, dark land, in a dark, dark forest, in a dark, dark cave, where there was a dark, dark knife laying on a dark, dark table.

On the dark, dark table was a dark, dark stain of blood. Beside the dark, dark table was a dark, dark closet. Inside sat a dark, dark man with the dark, dark name Draco Malfoy eating a dark, dark red grape.

Draco had a dark, dark depression where he thought about dark, dark things. Back to dark, da- sorry. Got a little caught up, I guess.

Back to the story...

The previous 'conversation' between Ron and Hermione was also very crucial to this story plot, so it would be very crucial _if_ the authoress actually had a plot.

As Ron finished his Arithmacy essay, Harry had walked out on the school grounds to go too dear Dumbledore's White Tomb. Harry hadn't particularly gotten over his dear headmaster's death, but at least he wasn't locking him up in his room, pitying himself. Of course that _is_ understandable, but think positive!

Except for fact that it is hard to think positive when depressed… Hmmm…

Again I must say; Back to the story…

Hermione had of course gotten Head Girl. When she was announced the Great Hall at least were decent to look _surprised_, because everybody knew that Hermione would get the badge since _1st year_.

Today she had to go patrolling with Crabbe, the new Headboy. No, not really… Crabbe was way too stupid… The new Headboy was….

**A/N: For the next chapter (which I hope will be out on January 1st) I'd like somebody, ANYBODY to tell me who is the new Headboy, 'cause I don't like Ron, Harry has waaaay too much to do, and Draco is in a dark, dark cave eating blood grapes…. Please?**

**And Thanks to my reviewers:**

**Redsoxfreak01: Sorry I didn't update for a long time, but I have had a biig, BIIG, BEEEEEEG writer's block…:S Glad you liked it!**

**Humancalculator: Hehe.. Funny review:D It's pretty ironic, because I had that song stuck in my head, for the entire day when I got the review, so, I was kinda… I don't know how to say it.. lol:D**


	3. Attack of the Little Two Year Olds

_A/N: Ok, you can kill me… But I could use some more reviews… Well, sorry for the delay.. Here you have it: Chapter 3. _

**Attack of the Killer Two Year Olds**

The new Head Boy was….. Mot Elddir (the name is not revealing at ALL). He was very ugly.  
He had just 'transferred' from a little independent school in Antarctica. There's just this little fact that it didn't exist.

But even though Dumbledore's portrait told them that it didn't exist, everyone thought it was so _exciting _ to hear about how he conquered the good (not a hint at ALL) in the school campus. Everyone though he just failed to say 'evil' and said 'good' in confusion. But you readers _know better_.

In last chapter I told you that Hermione had to go on patrol with the new Head Boy. In fact Mot Elddir had fed the old Head Boy to the Giant Squid… After cutting him with a pink plastic spoon. And I tell you, it is a _slow_ process. But nothing too graphic.

Now over to Hermione:

'Hello' said Hermione.

'Hello' said Mot.

'Where shall we start?' Said Hermione.

'COUGH mudblood COUGH'

'Pardon me?'

'ATTACK'

And now hundreds of little two year old girls with pink ribs in their hair and pink little dresses came running from everywhere sticking pink sticky lollipops in every person's hair on the way (let's not look at the fact that many of those persons are 6 foot high…).

'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA' everybody asked.

'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA' the little girls screamed.

'MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA' Hermione maniacally laughed.

_In next chapter:_

_The Last Battle_

_Ron is on fire_

_I don't know about the rest. _

_At least it will be longer_

_Thanks to _

_RedSoxFreak01: I'm glad you liked it. I'm just not good at writing Neville or Crabbe and my bigsis came up with this really random idea… Hope you like this one too;)_

_xAnGLlz ULliMiTeDx :  Glad you liked it. Again the one with Neville… I really can't write him well (just as I can't write another character, BUT!) I hope you like this one too!_


	4. The End Of ButterBeerCork Necklaces

**Chapter 4 – The very end of butter beer bottle cork necklaces**

As the authoress (isn't that a funny word?) said in last chapter, there would be a part about Ron. His hair to be more exact. But that authoress is a liar. She is the other part of me that only lies and despised happiness.

So the entire chapter 3 note was a lie.

Honestly.

Seriously!

Let's just get on with the story…

Today was a very good day in the life of Luna Lovegood. This day she had avoided getting suffocated by her bed curtains, getting scolded by the hot water while showering, drowning in toothpaste, dying from food poisoning, breaking her back by the book bag, cutting her finger on her parchment and bleed to death, getting crushed by falling books in the library.

She could go on and on like there was no tomorrow (which she was happy that there was. Though some super volcano could any time erupt…) But after the library… She was still as lucky.

"I'm going to the library" Luna shouted over her shoulder (actually not only the people behind her could hear her, but also them in front, to the left, and to the right could hear her) to Bob, her imaginary friend.

People looked at her weirdly, because they knew she didn't have any friends. Except from Harry Potter, Ronald Weasly whose hair looked strangely burnt, Neville Longbottom, Ginevra Weasly and Hermione Granger. They fought side by side in the ministry 2 years ago, so they knew each other.

Not that it was something the famous Harry Potter wanted. He was rather ashamed of knowing her. Imagine having a friend with radish earrings and butter beer bottle cork necklaces. I would actually think she was rather cool.

But that's my opinion, and I will only say my opinion if I'm asked, and nobody asks, so nobody knows except from me, and you. Easy peasy!

On Luna's way up to the library she found another butter beer bottle cork for her butter beer bottle cork necklace.

She picked it up.

Slowly and carefully she put it into her pocket.

At that exact moment some person who was in Antarctica who absolutely hated gillywater, who hated people who drank it, hated people that have a distant cousin who drinks it, hated people who once had a dog that ran across a road where some witches were walking 10 years ago drinking gillywater (A/N: credit to Anders 'Anden' Matthesen, Danish comedian. Absolutely hilarious!) saw a sign on her monitor that the butter beer bottle cork had been picked up after X number of years of it just laying there.

After a second, Luna pulled a crisp out of her Pringles can, which made the can explode, and the sound started and avalanche in Spain (where else? I luuurve Spain) which made the volcano on Mars explode.

That made the star-scientists wonder why it happened, and their train of thoughts woke up the dinosaurs, which made the Tyrranus Saurus Rex roar and at that exact second thousands of butter beer bottle corks exploded from the walls of Hogwarts, all landing on Luna.

And all of this happened in just a second.

" I, Luna Lovegood, am now officially rich! I am RICH!", she shouted to nobody but herself.

But because Luna had been in Suspended animation for X number of years, nobody alive were in Hogwarts. She had failed to notice the big 'H' on their forehead (A/N: again, credit to Red Dwarf, amzingest TV-series in the whole wide world (stretches out arms to show how much, but remembers her arm hurts, so she can't stretch it out)! And yes, I do realise that it's a pretty old series, but who cares?).

What Luna didn't was that she wasn't rich, the dinosaurs had not risen again, the volcano on Mars didn't erupt, and she did not have an imaginary friend named Bob. He was actually her only friend.

He came from Dog Foot, and island between Italy and Egypt. It was shaped like a dogs foot, hence the name, and the inhabitants of Dog Foot say that a great big dog was walking across the world, and his only footstep left was that island.

What actually happened was… nothing. It was all a creation from Luna's wild imagination, so it was a dream.

A very weird dream.

When Luna woke up she saw her butter beer bottle cork necklace safely on the floor. She hadn't completed the butter beer bottle cork necklace, but now the missing place was filled.

She screamed (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!) bloody murder.

That was the end of butter beer bottle cork necklaces for Luna Lovegood

* * *

**A/N: Damn… I only got one review, but that's what you get when you write a crappy chapter. Well, I personally like this one much better. _But please review!_ I realise (actually I've known for quite a while) that my story isn't all that popular. Who cares? As long as some people actually read this stuff. And am I writing filler text? Why, I do believe I am!**

**BIG thanks to my big sis Boogie for reviewing!**

**Very funny review that didn't make any sense at all;D**


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